strangerthingshavehappened

shit happens, all the fucking time, more than i can handle, sometimes in waves, sometimes in breaks, and sometimes all at fucking once. i have trusted people and i have been so wrong. they probably feel the same way about me and i’m okay with that, i cannot fuck up my inner peace for the opinions of others, it’s said that a lion never loses sleep over the opinion of sheep and if you ask me if we all incorporate that, and think that way, we would all be a million fucking times happier, and not so fucking involved in each other’s miserable fucking lives. i have gained and i have lost over and over and over again, enough to drive a sane person crazy, and a crazy person well… at their peak of madness. i have been naive and i have been misunderstood, but who hasn’t? a while ago i though that this was a tragic, tragic mess, nobody gets me and nobody ever will, but only since i have reached my peak of madness ( which sometimes is not a bad thing but infact gives you clarity) have i embraced that and even actually like it that way. i am not here to make friends and to alter the chaos that i am for any-fucking-body else. i played that stupid game before and it sucked. i have been weak and pathetic but out of misery and self loath have i risen and learnt life’s lessons, you were born alone and you die alone, and the people you meet in between are teachers, they will either lift you higher and make you or they will fuck you up and break you down to such an extent that you don’t recognize them anymore and whats worse is that you don’t even recognize yourself. but either way they are teachers non the less, and when you hit rock bottom, you come face to face with reality, and sometimes its what you need to get delusion out of your head. a great man once said, that ” there will bee many circumstances in life that will lift you and and break you down, people will come and people will go, they will take everything you’ve got, sometimes life gets so hard that everything you’ve worked for comes crashing down, you will lose a lot of materialistic aspects in your life, you might have a lot of money and the next minute non, you might have fame and the next minute nobody will know your name, you will have many friends, you might even have a special person that you love, and the next minute they all walk away, but the only thing you truly have control over is yourself, that is one thing nobody can ever take away from you, there will always be struggle, it’s life so that is inevitable but the only thing that matters is you, don;t let them change you, don;t let them control you not for one minute. strength lies in not what you have or what you can do, strength lies in being an unbreakable pillar, in not losing yourself, not letting the external factors win.” that great man was right, i have lost myself many times, for many things, even for people, but only since i lost all of the above mentioned have i truly risen in every sense of the word. life will have limitless high’s and low’s this existence is all a test anyway, and the ultimate victory will be not letting anybody or anything conquer your soul, your spirit. i have learnt the hard way but i have learnt. dear life, please know this, the external factors will never matter again. 

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